I think of all the times I have expected to be loved back. I think of all the moments that I have felt disappointment in my heart because I feel that someone doesn't love me the way I love them. I also see it in others when they feel like they have not received the love or warmth that they were reaching for. There are times when we all may feel like, we give so much and get nothing or very little in return. We can often think or even say, how much "love hurts". Are we just comparing our love? My love is much stronger than yours! O.M.G!!
Recently, someone very close to me lost their love. Their partner ended the relationship and he was absolutely devastated, heart broken. It broke my heart to see this person so sad. All I could do was give lots of love & Reiki Healing which helped a lot, but I know it is only time that will completely heal this broken heart. He is definitely attached. He didn't want to be free. He wasn't ready. He so wanted to hang on to that love. The pain of not being loved back is excruciating!
I'm not sure that it helps me to know that love never asks to be loved back. But it does help me to look at what I am thinking in those times when I feel I am not getting back what I am giving out. I look at all the arguments and fights that people that really do love each other have. It is never about love or lack of love. It is always about attachment and not getting what they expect. It is because they are loving that person and expecting their love to be returned in the same manner. Imagine if we all just loved each other without expecting to be loved back. It kinda seems unbalanced doesn't it? Giving without expecting anything in return? Surely, this is only the love of Saints. Surely, this is only the love of God.
I think. like yoga & meditation, it is a practice. Loving and letting go, loving and letting go. Eventually, it will lead to freedom. Because really, isn't that what non-attachment means? Not being attached means you are free. I can feel the space already. But I know it will take quite a lot of practice. But then, all things worth while do.
I was given this quote by a dear friend. It has been hanging on my fridge for a while now and it pretty much sums up all of the above.
"The heart never takes. The heart never reaches out and grabs.
It receives by giving. But it can't just receive by giving.
It must receive by giving and then relaxing, knowing that it will receive".
- Guru Singh